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“My earliest known ancestor is a guy named Roger. No seriously, that’s his name. Fuckin’ Roger. No sir, admiral, saint shit in front of it. No Jackson, Adams, Winston behind it. Just fucking Roger. What family history can you pull from one regular-as-shit name? Were there other guys named Roger? Did my ancestor know ‘em? Did they get into fights? Was it like Highlander? ‘This one name is all I got, I’ll be damned if I share it with a pencil-dick motherfucker like you!’ Did my ancestor say shit like that? Was he an asshole? I don’t know.

“I think when you get to the ‘Roger’ point you should be allowed to just make shit up. So fuck it, Roger was the first black therapist slave. No, even better, he wasn’t a slave, he was JUST a therapist. And not JUST the first black therapist… My great, great, great, great, how-ever-many-more great granpa Roger was the first therapist in fucking history. The king of therapists actually. Had a crown an’ shit. Fuck it. Why not? I could say he invented dominoes if I wanted to, how could anybody prove me wrong? What can you say?…’I don’t think a slave named Roger could’ve done that,’ And I’ll say, ‘He did a’lotta shit before he became Roger. Being the first man in outer space was only one of them.'”

Just Jokes


In the past I have had Facebook friends give me names of TV shows to write scenes for and rappers to write bars for. This time I asked my friends to give me the name of a comedian and a subject for a joke. Enjoy…
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When you’re looking for a reason to dismiss someone because something about them intimidates you, challenges you…be VERY careful. Yes, you WILL find something, and yes, it WILL work; the special set of circumstances you have convinced yourself are the REASON for the person’s success will help you put them out of your mind. Only for a very brief moment though. Soon you’ll be seeking outside corroboration. Might even find yourself in some online ghettos where there are smart, eloquent people picking apart the person—who by now has become the bane of your existence…which is ironic because all you INITIALLY wanted to do was dismiss them. And since you have spent so much time TRYING to do this you haven’t even BEGAN to forge your OWN path to your OWN success. Weird.

Checking the Box

Man…when we get a new epithet we can use to dismiss vast swaths of people we run that sucka into the ground! I’m not exempt from any of this (I really need to stop saying that, as if the number of times I contradict myself on here aren’t telling enough). There’s a new one I’ve been seeing in my e-travels: pachibwape. I’m not going to define it for you. You can hit Google for that. I’m sure once you do this’ll happen…

    “Oooooooh, I actually know a guy like that. I didn’t know they had a name! Awesome! Now I have a box to put him in. Can’t wait to throw it at him during our next Facebook debate! He’s gonna be so pissed!”

Okay, you might not do all that, but you get my point. When we start to discern similarities within individuals we start to group them. It’s hard for us NOT to do this as it seems to be inherent. We’re obsessed with quantifying and measuring things. And while we’re grouping others they are grouping us. How we feel about the group in which we are most often placed factors into how we feel about ourselves and this feeling is typically based on how others feel about the group in which we are most often placed…others outside our group to be exact.

One teeming-below-the-surface irony you’ll find in discussions where high-negative-perception group people are talking about whether or not their high-negative-perception is responsible for their shared problems is an intense mystification…a seeming reverence for the groups whose members are thought to possess the high-negative-perception. Their LIVES become DICTATED1 by the OTHER group’s perception. And no, high-positive-perception people aren’t immune to this. Their existence is EQUALLY reflective.

I shouldn’t have to point out the irony that I just did what I talked about. Especially after already doing as much at the top of this post. But you know why I gotta do it? Because I don’t want people thinking I think I am better than them. I don’t want them to develop a negative-perception of me based on that. Why though? Ain’t shit I can do about that. Besides, they will never know if I ACTUALLY feel that way. I could confirm or deny it. Doesn’t matter. Because they will never know how I REALLY feel. So screw them. But who are they? Who are these people who think I think I’m better than? How do I even know they exist? Oh yeah, that’s right. I’ve known some (or ‘a sum of’) people who’ve told me that they thought I thought that I was bett—
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The E(In)ternal Apocalypse

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Of course dark, scary prophecy is coming true. It’s ALWAYS coming true…because we’ve ALWAYS been afraid of the same shit…and I’m sure many of you out there have had experiences in your lives where fears (intense worries) have manifested as reality thanks to that busy little demon known as self-sabotage. I know I have. Speaking of sabotage…
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Seems like most of our reasons for desiring relationships are incredibly narcissistic. We look for people who both complement and compliment us. It’s ALL about us. I’m not saying it should be all about THEM. But what about that nebulous, beautiful thing that is the UNION? The thing WE create when we come TOGETHER.

ABSOLUTE love may be the most militant thing we can do. That’s why barely anybody ever does it, or even ATTEMPTS it, yet MILLIONS of SO-CALLED militants take up arms, maim, kill. Not saying it’s EASY to maim and kill (PTSD kinda proves that), but there is most definitely a reason why wanton violence is met with ennui and we freak the fuck out when people are TOO nice. It’s also why we ferociously debate the POSSIBLE existence of PEOPLE who some believe to have been REAL-LIFE absolute lovers, instead of ruminating on whether or not the IDEA of absolute love itself is even POSSIBLE.

Is it?

Most would answer no, resoundingly. But why is that? Why do we doom ourselves like this? And why have we BEEN dooming ourselves…for age after (quite-literally) bloody age? And before I go any further…I ain’t shit, I’m over here bitter, narcissistic, misanthropic, hypocritical, full of entitlement and expectations. I am FAR from an absolute lover myself. But this isn’t about me. This is about—

Nah. Fuck that. We’re not gonna do that ‘it starts with ONE’ bullshit. Hell no. The world has to change FIRST and then I’ll change. I’m not gonna be out here trying to love these assholes. Fuck them. What I look like doin’ some gay shit like that? You got me fucked all-the-way up. But you know what? How about I make a compromise? How about I just pour love into the thing that brings me joy? Then give that to these assholes. Maybe they’ll dig it. Hell, they might even LOVE it. Can I do that and still be ‘good?’ I don’t think I can do that Gandhi or MLK stuff. Besides, they weren’t ABSOLUTE lovers themselves! That’s just their legacies. Legacies we molded, created because we need a point or ‘form’ to meditate upon. Something REAL (but highly idealized) to zealously and very publicly worship. A being who sacrificed personal dignity to show that TRUE love is possible. And the more aggressively we celebrate this being the closer we feel we are to true love (like love hangers-on). But what does this say about us? Why MUST we KNOWINGLY idealize complicated, messy flesh-and-blood people in order to believe in unflappable love? In other words: Why do we have to bullshit ourselves into believing in love? What are we without the bullshit? Are we—

Oh yeah, that’s right.

The thing. JUST pour it into the thing.

But what about the plight of mank—

Okay, okay, I got it. The thing. The damn thin—

But isn’t that what I’m doing right now? I mean I kinda love doing this shit…kinda frustrated right now though, not doing too good a job of closing this one out. So what is it? Are we doomed to ‘bullshit love?’ Can we love ABSOLUTELY? Of course I want the latter to be true, but I just don’t know. I mea—

Wait. Wait.

It’s ALWAYS here!!! ALWAYS with us!!! Even when we THINK and BELIEVE it isn’t!!! It’s IN the thing!!! The gift!!! The TRUE LOVE is in the thing!!! Our purpose is just A manifestation of it!!! Yes, our gifts may be unique, diverse, but our LOVE for them is EXACTLY and ABSOLUTELY the same!!! We just have to believe IN ourselves!!! FOLLOW the love!!!

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