Clusters of Fuck

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A couple weeks ago while waiting for the library to open I got into an awesome little rap session with a kindred spirit. One thing that really stood out (been thinking about it ever since) was this bit about he and his wife becoming DNA clones by virtue of all the genetic information they exchange via physical intimacy and living in close proximity to one another. I thought this was a fascinating premise, one that could be extended beyond intimate relationships to our everyday, mundane encounters and even our violent back-and-forths.

Speaking of which…

When we come together in battle (like particles colliding) we spill blood, sweat, tears and all sorts of genetically rich material onto one another. Perhaps there is an evolutionary force that—no matter the nature of our unions (loving or hateful)—ensures that the sharing of genetic information will persist by any means necessary. Now I don’t know if this force prefers that we do its bidding in a loving manner or a violent one, but given the fact that the former seems to be smoother and requires less clean up (both physically and emotionally) it might prefer the efficiency of love. I could just be trying to glass-half-full this, but if that’s the case: WHY? Why do I ‘want’ to see it this way?

Am I delusional?

If so, is my delusion the result of a genetic predisposition? Did this desire to believe evolve into being? Considering that everything that exists has infinite ‘roots’ (meaning: everything is a ‘seed’ evolving into another ‘seed’)—is our belief infinite? If so that would make it ‘real,’ even if it is a delusion as that would mean it came from ‘somewhere.’ Sorry, I mean it’s constantly COMING from somewhere, but where? Where is this place from which all things are constantly coming? Does it PHYSICALLY exist? Can we go there? Are we ALREADY there? Why does the idea of ‘constantly coming’ sound so sexual? Maybe evolution is a sexual thing. Maybe it’s like an infinite orgasm. But what is creating the infinite friction that’s causing this flood of evolutionary ejaculate? Is the energy of evolution—all the constant frenetic change—creating it? If so, isn’t that kinda masturbatory? Well, maybe it’s not REALLY masturbatory because it’s composed of an infinity of things ‘rubbing’ together. Maybe it’s like an orgy. But that can’t be right. That’s freaky. The universe can’t be freaky. There needs to be two distinct things coming together to constantly create all things. Not just ONE clusterfuck-y thing. That’s not ‘right.’

Actually…

It is VERY right! I can perceive this one thing as God if I want. Yeah! That’s what I’ll do. I’ll just ignore all the details—they’re constantly changing anyway; and this constant change cancels itself out, it lowest-common-denominates to being JUST infinitely relatively diverse which makes it no ‘different’ than infinite space and since space exists WITHIN all things the entirety of the universe is just one big non-relative ‘thing.’ But what is the nature of this thing? Well, if I so desired I could sift through the diversity for clues…or I could just make some shit up. The possibilities are endless.

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