“I love what you DO, not YOU.”

Do you love Chinese people as much as you love their food? Do you love Indian women as much as you love their hair? Do you love Russians as much as you love their vodka? Do you love scientists as much as you love the innovations their research makes possible? Do you love Caribbean people as much as you love their beaches? Do you love Germans as much as you love their cars?

The answer to most of these is probably a resounding no…and you know why? Because NARCISSISM rules the day!!! If we ALL loved the people behind the cultures we CONSUME we would be livin’ MLK’s dream! But this is not the case. For the most part, we are a society of dilettantes and takers. We serve SELF. We even see this phenomenon play out in our social advocacy decisions: the only reason most us give a damn about The Issues™ is because they affect people that are like US!!! We have a VERY HARD time relating to ‘others,’ which makes it difficult for us to advocate for them. Makes sense though. Why would a white dude give a’damn about black dudes getting shot by cops? Judging by the media narrative (oftentimes the only narrative our myopic asses pay attention to), it’s not likely to happen to him. This is that narcissistic shit and ironically it is the tie that binds us ALL! We are UNITED in our narcissism! We love what people do FOR us, not the people themselves. We are not unconditional lovers. Our love (or should I say ‘tolerance?’) comes with a plethora of conditions. Probably explains why we hold those relatively rare few who we believe love sans condition in such high regard. We even WORSHIP them. And no, I am FAR FROM immune. All this shit I’m talking comes from a very real and personal place. As the old saying goes: Game recognize game, or in this case: Lame recognize lame.


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