When they said: “You think you know it all.”

I SHOULD’VE said: “I’m sorry if the confident way in which I asserted myself made you feel ashamed of the gaps in your knowledge and/or inability—dictated by a fearful speculation of what others may think—to assert yourself in a similarly confident manner. But more importantly, NO, I do not think I know it all. That would make me a delusional asshole. Truth is, I am actually full of—often crippling—self doubt. To combat this I sometimes assert opinions sans encumbering doubtful modifiers like ‘I think’ and ‘some people.’ Not only does this help me overcome my I-wonder-what-people-would-think-if-they-knew-I-thought-this-way fears, but due to their emphatic this-is-the-way-it-is nature, these perspectives may also provoke impassioned responses; responses that have the potential to edify, expand my worldview.”

To which they would’ve probably responded with: “That sounds like some shit a know-it-all would say.”

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